Nothing Tastes Good

This week has been a little rough. I contracted influenza earlier this week and have been bedridden for a few days now. I was then lucky enough to receive an internet STD from a Facebook friend. I’m still trying to apologize for the explicit images that consumed my Facebook page. Adding insult to injury, the only thing that tastes good is popcorn. I’m in the promised land of food and everything is going to make me hurl.

As I’ve spent an inordinate number of hours horizontal, trying to calm my stomach, I’ve caught up on some reading. For those of you who have always wanted to but never found the time, I have finished Robert Graves’s Claudius the God and his Wife Messalina for you. Please, don’t thank me. I’ll sum up here.

First, there was Caesar Augustus; an alright dude and good leader.


Caesar Augustus

Augustus was then followed by Tiberius and Claudius. Between these two, the Roman Empire was systematically bankrupted.


Emperor Caligula

Enter our protagonist! Claudius become emperor and successfully rebuilt and extended the Roman Empire.

AGUfiizi 19

Emperor Claudius

Claudius was followed by Nero. And as we all know, Nero was a megalomaniac and tore apart the empire once again.

The general take away from my bedrest and foray into historic novels? Well, as long as your predecessors and successors are really bad at their job and you do your best, they’ll make you a god. Literally, they’ll vote on it and add you to their pantheon.



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